When Life Sends You On A Journey
Showing posts with label Denver. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Denver. Show all posts

Saturday, April 27

Business School, Turning 21 and Changes Galore ....

So much was going on in my life in 1986 and 1987, it is downright nutty to try to decide what to mention first. I think I will 'start at the very beginning', like Maria sings in "The Sound of Music." :)

Sanford-Brown had a jobs notice board. I decided to try to find a part time job while going to Business School. I got hired on after passing their test at Western Union. The telegram company. The Internet hadn't yet become a public useful thing at the time, people still sent telegrams everyday as well as money to people in need. I learned real quick this place monitored EVERYTHING you did.  You had to get a time card and punch it on the wall, when you started your work, when you got up to use the restroom or take your break, when you came back from break, and at the end of your shift.  You were allotted so much time based on your hours worked for restroom breaks.  If you went over that, you were docked.  If you took a longer break than allotted, same thing, docked for the overage. 
No one really came to you and spoke to you once you entered the room where all the computer terminals were.   You were an Operator number and nothing more.  I did not like this.   I worked there for about a year, and only as a means to make money.  I made no friends there, and because it could be stressful, I started smoking...  

The stress came from the pushing to have everyone sell things that cost more than the average fee of sending a telegram.   And they monitored your phone calls.  I don't know how they did that with over 100 employees spread out in at least 4 rooms of terminals, but they did.  The 4 rooms I remember shared one corner from each butted together, and in that area there was a monitoring station with a couple people working, every day, every minute.   This company ran 24/7, 365 days a year.  I worked 25-30 hours a week at first, just enough to keep me busy but below full time status.  To get on full time there involved politicking.  Which I never got into.  You had to have recommendations from other full timers or from management.  Well having never really gotten to know anyone there, that wasn't going to happen, and the longer I stayed, the more I hated it, so in my mind why would I ever want to be their FULL TIME.  They charged union dues, even if you didn't technically belong to the union.  I never understood that, but they docked me a set amount on every time card for it.   I believe I was making $6 a hour back then, which was nice.  All my summer jobs before only paid minimum wage, $3.35/hr.  I had no true benefits, so I had to get medical insurance on my own. 

Some time while into working at WU, 2 days per week got slashed off my work schedule, so I dropped to 15-18 hours a week.   To fill in the income gap, I found a job with Emerson Electric.  It was fun there, but the biggest problem was that the Union workers were all on strike, and no one knew when they'd return.  I only worked at EE 2 days a week for a month and they had to let me go because the strike was preventing them from getting the workload to keep me busy.  That sucked, because I really enjoyed that kind of job.  But I don't specifically remember what I did there....it was too short a run.   I just remembered there were nice people and it was kinda interesting to walk past the work stations the union members would work at building whatever it was they built.   I think it was parts for airplanes.

I don't think I ever found any other place that would work with my schedule to work only 2 days a week.  So by early 1987 I was looking again for full time employment.  I found that at Bob Schultz Motorcycle Supermarket. 

They actually had 2 stores, and sold more than just motorcycles, and parts for them.  They also sold John Deere and White lawn equipment.  They sold 3 wheel ATVs, which over time became a problem with the amount of dangerous stunts and accidents people had, so they slowly started selling 4 wheel ATVs.  My job was to help do all the paperwork, including getting financing for those wishing to finance their purchases rather than pay cash.  Although most of the ATVs and bikes were less than $5,000, most people chose to finance.  There were dozens of forms to have filled out before the purchaser came to sign.  My biggest problem wasn't the work, it was the manager/owner.  He was a very aggravating and sometimes downright nasty person to work with. 

I got the job after showing some backbone in convincing him that I was worth more than just minimum wage.  Although he advertised the position as minimum wage position, I talked him up to $4 an hour.  I had made $6.50 an hour when I left Western Union, but that was for part time work, this was full time and not likely to have cut hours.  So he agreed to the pay rate if I showed him I could be dependable and do the work.  I was and I did.  Until one day when he wasn't there, and I was doing the closing with a purchaser.   The guy asked how the bike went from $3500 on the sales floor to over $5000 at closing.  I was trained to "fudge" how that happens....I didn't like the magical trick of lying to people.  Instead of pointing to the final sales price, I was to tell them them monthly payment and this guy wasn't budging and wasn't signing.  The salesman got all nervous and didn't want to lose the sale, he only got paid commission on the number of bikes he sold (maybe too on John Deere's, I don't know).  He called Bill the boss and Bill asked to talk with me, and proceeded to yell at the top of his lungs at me over the phone, I became totally unnerved and started freaking out, and dropped the phone and went into a closet and cried.  I had never been treated so badly by an employer in all my life up to then. 

I wanted to quit but couldn't find anything in the paper advertised where I met the qualifications for.  I was so confused, and really avoided being around Bill when he came to the office after that.  I don't recall if he ever apologized for his treatment towards me.  He was such a nasty person at times, and then when he wasn't that, he would say things that would make any woman feel uncomfortable.  Not TO them, just about women in general.  Stupid things.  I learned a lot that year, that was for sure.  I did have good times with the other ladies in the office.  Donna and Joyce were wonderful to me.  I worked a couple times at the other store, which had a different ambiance altogether. 

During this time is when Lisa and I had visited Colorado.  About a month after that she decided she had to move back to Colorado and wanted me to come.  She was working at a car rental place at the airport and found she could easily transfer out to their office in Denver.  Good for her.   But I couldn't do that.  She left me behind until she could find a suitable apartment for me to move to live with her.  That was the plan anyways. I began saving my money and boxing up my stuff to have sent out there ahead of me. 

I turned 21 that year.   Which was a blessing and a curse.  I was now legal to go to any dance club I wanted, but now my friend who got me involved in dance night's out was in Denver.  I hung around some friends from high school, Carmen and Michelle.  We hung with some guys one of them knew, and went horseback riding at Creve Coeur Park.  We had a lot of good times.. but when I turned 21 I felt the weight of being taken advantage of.   Carmen kept bugging me to purchase alcohol for them to take to a party or somewhere, and I refused.  I remember that feeling to this day how that felt.  I remember that was pretty much the end of the partying and hanging around with them.  And I never saw Carmen again, not for a VERY long time. 

I decided to keep my mind on moving to Denver in the Spring of 1988....and for all the changes yet to come in my life from that point on.

....when you are young and free to do as you wish, the world opens up and seems inviting and ominous at the same time.  Being naïve is normal when you are young, you haven't learned the outside world and how it truly ticks.   But naivety also comes with some warnings.   Whatever you thought you knew, that you learned from your family, may not be how everyone else lives and does their lives.  It's in the coming of age that we truly learn what kind of people we are, what kind of ethics we have and what kind of life we want to live.  Sometimes we grow, sometimes we freeze out of fear, and sometimes we take risks....and realize good or bad can result.  I had a lot of those kinds of lessons in life.  Read on, things get complicated really quick next. 


The horse I was on at Creve Coeur Park
I took the picture, ergo, not in the picture!
 

Michelle on her horse - more experienced rider !
 
 
Chris, Michelle, and Carmen with guy I don't recall name of
 
Don and Glenn, salesmen at Bob Schultz
Christmas party 1987
 
 
Joyce and her husband at Christmas Party 1987





Friday, April 19

Circles Of Friends ...

I met a lot of people in Business School, but the main person I became very close to was Lisa R.  She introduced me to tons of people over the course of our friendship. Now honestly I cannot remember the order of when some things happened but I'll do my best to tell the stories as best I can remember.  

First was Lisa S.  Lisa S.'s father owned a car dealership in the Metro area.  I never met her parents but I did meet her brothers.  I recall going to a lake, possibly The Lake of the Ozarks, and swimming off a dock and drinking.  I know the older brother of Lisa S. was there.  But there were several people there I didn't know.  I could swim fine but I was afraid of lakes and rivers that were deep that I couldn't see the bottom of.  Oh that was a huge fear of mine.  I just stayed near the dock for fear of floating out too far and being bounced around in the waves when boats would fly by.  I just stayed around Lisa R. and listened to the goings on.  I was a bit out of my element being around so many people I didn't know and with guys around.  I always felt like it was mandatory to be flirting with guys ... and I just didn't know how to do that yet.

There was Kelly and her husband and family.  Lisa R. and I probably spent several weekends hanging with them.  Lisa met Kelly at a place she worked.  I remember attending Kelly's wedding reception and that they had a macaw, huge bird.   I always was fascinated by the talking birds of the parrot family.  Kelly and her husband had a lot of issues, and I don't know whatever happened to them. 

Lisa R. was known for trying to help others any way she could.  She loved to see married couples get along, and she LOVED with a Capital "L" children!  Anyone that had a little one, she was all over it.  I loved kids too, I just wasn't as open with new ones I was introduced to, they always seemed a little scared of me.  Lisa also loved animals, particularly dogs I believe.  Anyone who had a dog, big or small, she showed affection towards.  I was not particularly keen to large dogs, as I had gotten bit by a dog when I was a child and bigger dogs just intimidated me. 

Lisa R. was a person of great emotion.  She was dating Greg when I met her.  He was a very unique and loveable person.  He had a wonderful talent in art, especially with his drawing.  He was a super fanatic of the rock group "KISS" and could draw every member and every record album perfectly by memory.   I was in awe with his artistic ability. He also was trained as a drummer.  Another cool thing I liked about Greg.  I'll mention more about this in a later post.  Greg was in love with Lisa.  That was utterly apparent.  She loved him, but her parents did not.  It was that great stress of having one's parents not approve of your choices of mates that would have her leave Greg and latch onto someone else. 

The someone else I am referring to is Ron.  He was a nice guy, but something about him I didn't care for.  He was a volunteer EMT I believe.  One of the first guys I sort of dated was Bill.  He was Ron's friend.  Bill was a unique dude.  I don't remember much about him and I think that was a practical thing on my part.  We went out a couple times, and one evening Lisa and I met up with Ron and Bill.  Lisa and Ron went off to talk alone, leaving Bill with me alone.  He was interested in robotic gizmos, and told me about his robotic helicopter.  We were sitting on someone's car, and talking for a couple hours it seems.  Then Lisa and Ron returned, we all went to Bill's house and that's when things got way too serious for me.  Lisa and Ron spent time together and Bill was acting weird and I guess trying to come on to me.  I just was so afraid, so naïve, and I kept telling him no.  He left me on the sofa. It was like 3am I think.  I tried to go to sleep, kept hoping Lisa would return so we could go home.  It was like 5am when we finally got home.  I was coming in as my Mom was getting up.  That was awfully strange to say the least.  I was angry with Lisa for putting me in that uncomfortable spot, as I had no way to leave...she was my ride.   And the last thing I remember about Bill was that he and Lisa had a talk about me, and then he started hitting on her.  Well then I think she understood why I was uncomfortable.  One of the first paralyzing memories I have of dating a guy.  Really messed with my head for a LONG time after that.

Early in 1987 I had met Gary through Greg. Gary and I dated for a few months. Gary, Greg and Chuck, all lived at the Salvation Army residence in town. Gary was from Indiana and was in the Missouri National Guard. He didn't have a settled home and wound up in my hometown. Chuck, well, I am not sure I know where Chuck was from. He and Gary met up with Greg at The Salvation Army home and became friends. Greg thought Gary was my type I guess and I dated him. He was a very timid soul. We got a long pretty well. The three guys managed to get some work lined up and rented a townhome together. It was a new place, really nice, a bedroom for each of them. Chuck always felt out of place, he wasn't dating anyone and I think seeing Lisa with Greg and me with Gary made him feel a little like a 5th wheel when we all went out to dinner or do anything together. We spent a lot of time at that townhouse.

Gary was into me, but I was not as responsive as he would like. Again, naïve and fearful of guys, thanks to Bill, I was just not sure about getting involved in a romance with Gary. I really needed support and guidance from Lisa, but she was too interested in her romance with Greg that she was not paying attention to much else.  So I just didn't accept Gary's advances and eventually he would find someone else to get heavily involved with.  Don't know where he picked up this gal, but she was every bit 10-15 years older than him.  I was jealous and hurt... and Lisa was mad as heck at Gary for hurting me so.  I hadn't felt like I was in love with him, and for me to get seriously involved with anyone had to have love and passion there.  After he effectively dumped me, probably weeks later, I could tell that I had felt something for him.   And then started blaming myself for not responding to his needs sooner.  It was the first time I had dated and had my heart broken.  This would haunt me for a long time...not Gary particularly, but just the idea I had a guy, refused him and then was dumped.   Rejection of that type hurts very deeply.  I wouldn't understand the confusion I was in for a long long time. 

In July 1987 Lisa and I flew out to Denver, her old hometown, and stayed with her former neighbors.  They put us up for the time we were out there.  Lisa used to babysit their kids, I was introduced to them all.  The boy played ice hockey and I remember him getting all his gear together to go to practice.  Nice kids.  Nice family.  I cannot recall their names anymore.  But I do remember feeling very welcomed there. 

While out in Denver for this visit, Lisa also introduced me to her former boyfriend, Jimmy.  And to Jimmy's parents and brother and sister-in-law.  It was July, got to be 95 degrees during the day.  Hot but not humid.  Something very new to me, as St. Louis July summer days could equally get up to 95 but it was also always oppressively humid.  Something I detested.  In the evening, in Denver, it got down into the 50s, huge drop in temp, and with the low humidity it felt like it was in the 40s to me.  I had to borrow a winter coat so I wouldn't freeze.  Lisa and Jimmy laughed at me wearing a winter coat in July, but hey when you're cold, you're cold!

I loved Denver, smog and all!  The family we were staying with took Lisa and I on a drive to Evergreen Colorado, which was in the foothills of the Rockies.  Gorgeous!  It was so cool to drive into the mountains, first time I had ever seen MOUNTAINS in my life!  You could see them from Denver pretty well if the brown smog wasn't bad.  Hwy 70 goes west straight into and through the mountains, literally.   Before getting there though you had to drive by Stapleton Airport, and that was the first time I had been on a highway the went under the airport...well the runways actually.  That was so cool....long tunnels to drive in.  2 to be exact.  St Louis would much later expand and create something similar, but not with a highway such as I70 driving under/through it. 

Lisa and Jimmy were high school sweethearts, but Lisa had to move after high school when her Dad got transferred to St Louis.  He worked for TWA airlines.  They were all originally from New York City, Long Island.  He got transferred to Denver when Lisa was in grade school.  Lisa always told me lots of stories about the people she knew in NYC and Denver, and always talked about Jimmy.  Even sometimes while dating Greg.  I just knew her heart was split on these two fellas.  Ron was just someone that was accepted by her parents, but not like Greg or like Jimmy.  I didn't have a preference of either, both were fun to be around.  Greg was from the country and was an unbridled kind of guy with I think ambition to be in a Rock Band and to get out of his hometown and be with Lisa.  Jimmy didn't have a passion in any type of particular work, he just wanted to party and have fun.  That's what I remember of these two guys.


....some relationships are not meant to last a lifetime, but all relationships teach us something.  They teach us about humanity, about ourselves, and about human emotions of all kinds.  I would soon be experiencing all sorts of emotions in the many months that followed my trip to Denver.  Hang on....literally and figuratively...the ride is going to get very bumpy!




Here are some photos of some of the people during this time.  No I have no photos of Gary, Chuck, Ron, Bill or even myself.  I always was the one behind the camera.   I was the one wanting to take photos of others as keepsakes...for this very blog even before blogs were invented!  If I find any photos of any of these folks, I will update this post.  I always do.


 


 
Kelly at her home Christmas 1986
 
 
 
Greg and Lisa (and Greg's nephew) at Greg's Sister's home




Lisa S., Lisa R. and Greg down on the Riverfront